CENSUS 2001

If  you  can  spare  the  time,   folk,   please  direct  a

Kindly  thought  to  your  Census  Form  Collector,

       He  or  she  is  only  trying  to  do  their  job  - - Okay?

No  need  to  treat  them  with  suspicion,

It's  not  the  Spanish  Inquisition,

      No-one's  intending  to  harass  you  or  intrude  in  any  way.

When  the  call  went  out  for  applicants,

Bright-eyed  hopefuls  saw  the  chance

      To  earn  themselves  a  dollar  doing  something  quite  worthwhile,

"If  only  we  had  known - -  "

In  hindsight  some  now  groan,

     Although,  and  to  their  credit,  most  still  smile.

So  how  about  tying  up  old  Rover,

You  may  think  his  best  days  over -

      Well,  he  growled  and  threatened  mayhem  when  the  forms  were

                brought  around,

It  was  feared  tomorrow's  local  rag

Would  report  "SHREDDED  YELLOW  BAG!  

      But  no  trace  of  a  Collector  to  be  found!"

Gate  chains  only  a  Houdini  could  unravel,

Muddy  tracks  that  needed  gravel,

      Potholes  so  enormous  that  we  nearly  lost  the  car!

Driveways  never  ending,

Through  hills  and  gullies  wending,

      And  we  still  don’t  know  who  lives  there  "and  we  don't know  

               where  he  are" !

However,  there  were  compensations ,

Lots  of  lovely  conversations

      With  friendly  people  where  we  could  have  stayed  and  talked for

                hours,

Spring  was  in  the  air,

There  were  new  lambs  everywhere,

       And  hillsides  strewn  with  golden  wattle  flowers.

No  need  for  fuss  or  fluster,

Just  imagine  it’s  a  muster,

       A  head  count  of  Australians  -  When  that  yellow  bag appears,

Fill  in  that  form  and  don't  forget

It  helps  see  future  needs  are  met

      And  Census  Time  won't  come  again  at  least  for  five  more

                years!

                                                  Thank  goodness !

            ( Collector's  wife ..    i.e.  Grand  Chief  Gate  Opener! )